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Divorced Dad Help.


Dad's have rights too!

My friend Tom is a single father with 2 girls, has the following war story. “When my divorce was over, I thought, I am finally done with her! Little did I know that the next 13 years would be a roller coaster ride through the legal system. My ex is so possessed with making my life miserable, she takes me back to court every other year just to raise my child support.” This story is a common one. Some pre-divorce advice seems to be appropriate here.

Please consider doing the following as soon as you can.

Join a Father’s Rights Group. With the assistance of a Father’s Rights Group, a father can save thousands of dollars in legal fees and hopefully avoid attaining a poor lawyer. Most of these groups are non profit, and offer great information in attorney referrals, parenting classes, law, private investigators, mediation, mental health providers, and support. Don’t forget also, that many employers will help with the expenses for some of these services. For example, the mental health visits would likely be covered under health insurance. Some costs for the lawyer or parenting classes may be covered under your employer’s EAP (Emergency Assistance Program) if available.

Also, the NFRC provides extensive information about single parenting and resource links to other father's rights organizations. Check their website out to find assistance nearest you.

Learn Your Rights. Don’t think your friend Sam is an expert in divorce because he went through one 4 years ago. A father in a divorce or custody battle MUST know his rights or he will be unable to know if his lawyer is properly representing him. Again, joining the father’s rights group is one way to stay informed. Of course, there are also countless books available on the topic (remember the library?). These books will cover you all the way from the courts to the therapist’s couch.

Find a Good Attorney. Don’t just look at page 149 of the Yellow Pages for your attorney. Try to use personal referrals from friends, coworkers, other attorneys, or the father’s groups. Check at the court hearing your case and ask the Court Clerk for 3 references for a good, affordable attorney that has rapport with the judge. Meet with multiple attorneys (these consultations should free or at low cost to you) and decide on that face-to-face chemistry. Don’t forget to take notes so you remember necessary information. Don’t hesitate to fire your attorney if they fail to follow your directions, or do not live up to your expectations.

Our articles are created with the hope of assisting fathers, children, and families through these trying, extremely difficult times of separation and divorce. Through the Internet we hope to share our knowledge and empower fathers at the times when they feel the most lost and hopeless. I wish my fellow single fathers the best of luck and hope we can all survive the bitterness and pain of divorce, and keep our children happy and safe.

Finally - GOOD LUCK!

PLEASE, try to remain amicable.  It is really in everyone's best interests.  The lawyers get all the money when people play games.  Good luck.

Some other resources:

Get divorce papers online

Men's Divorce Tactics

Surviving Divorce

Help the kids survive Divorce

The Divorce Primer


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